I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
Randomize
