Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
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