This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
who knew "i drink your milkshake" would work as a pickup line
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
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