I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
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