I want to walk on stilts...naked
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
I'm bringing cupcakes to work today as an apology for my actions at the bar last night, my boss probably can't look at me the same ever again
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
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