We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
This gyro tastes like lonliness
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
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