He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
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