Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
Randomize
