He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
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My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
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When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
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