Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
Holy shit dude........stairs
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
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