is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
Randomize