Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
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