i just masturbated with purell and my dick burns and smells like a hospital
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
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