Don't you send me to vm
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
News Flash: Turtles are cuter than Jesus.
Congrats on damning at least 10 generations of your offspring to hell with just one text message. Way to start your morning off right.
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
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