my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
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