I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Randomize
