Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
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