I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
It was confusing and full of hummus
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
You snapped me at 3am drunk laying on your floor asking if I knew how we couldn't have predicted the housing crisis.
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
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