You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
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