i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
Brought him brownies before taking his pants off. I'm like the Martha fucking Stewart of booty calls. Walk of shame be damned.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
Why did my mother make you get naked?
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Randomize
