that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
So I was talking to her on the phone last night and had to mute it so I could take a crap.
Side Note: My mute button doesn't work.
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
Randomize
