mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
he convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. he slurred every word. i think i found my prince charming.
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
When we found you, you were half crying/half singing Taylor swift songs at 2am in the bathroom, and occasionally puking. I think I get "friend of the year" award just for putting up with your drunk ass all night.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
Randomize