:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
Randomize
