she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
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