Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
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