oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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