Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
Randomize
