Don't you send me to vm
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
Fun holiday story for you: Alex and I went out drinking. She left. I needed a ride home. Met this dude and told him to drive my car back. Once at my house, I made him take out my dog and then apologized for not wanting to make out with him. I said, let me go see if my roommate is interested and then I slept in Alex's bed all night.
20 bucks says he was an actual leprechaun
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
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