I woke up in a stranger's bathtub with a broken shower curtain as my blanket.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
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