he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
Randomize
