you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
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