I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
Also: I hate her so much. She's out at hooters, making spelling errors, while I'm literally sitting at a clinic getting std tested. Which of us won the morality award in this break up.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Randomize
