Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
Randomize
