I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
Best elective surgery ever. Having a great time ignoring girls' pleas to pull out and blowing it inside anyway. I like to watch them absolutely freak out and go batshit crazy for 20 mins before I mention the snip-snip surgery. Power trip.
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time