Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
I've Ubered to the bar three times this weekend to get my car but every time I get there I end up drinking. Still no car.
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
Randomize
