similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
Randomize
