If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
I intend to get homeless drunk
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
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