so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
Priorities: waking up on your doorstep desperately clutching half a meatball marinara but with no sign of your keys, purse or housemate. Where are you?!
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
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