I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up
Soap is not a condiment
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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