I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
Randomize
