If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
you fell asleep during kickboxing this morning
how does that even happen??
Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
In case you wake up wondering why your eyes hurt... You were claiming to be Zeus and that mortal weapons couldn't harm you. Some chick took it as a challenge and pepper sprayed you. Sorry dude.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
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