He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
Randomize