Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
The beers last night were like the tears from god
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
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