so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
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