I wannas sexs uuuuu
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
Randomize