I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
Just reminding you that you are currently drunk spooning a chair saying it "loves you unconditionally". No more rum.
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
Randomize