I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
Fuck. I just got my nipple tweaked by a plus size drag queen in a purple dress. I feel like I got molested by Grimace.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
I just elbowed a roll of wrapping paper, and said “ohh sorry”. I’m still drunk.
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