I can't find my pants or my car
I didn't even hookup I think I took them off at taco bell...
ha omg I always lose my dignity at taco bell as well... so no big deal.
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
Randomize
