It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
Randomize
