Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
Randomize
