Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
Randomize
